


Missing the feeling (or feeling the missing)

by CheesiPinky



Category: Moominvalley (Cartoon 2019), Mumintroll | Moomins Series - Tove Jansson, 楽しいムーミン一家 | Moomin (Anime)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, F/M, this is my first fic don't kill me
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-14
Updated: 2019-05-14
Packaged: 2020-03-05 11:40:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,543
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18827962
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CheesiPinky/pseuds/CheesiPinky
Summary: ''And after all this years, i still love you''





	Missing the feeling (or feeling the missing)

‘’Bye, mom’’  
‘’Good bye, sweetie’’

The Mymble waved her hand in a sign of goodbye while seeing one of her daughters at the door with her luggage, of course, another one of her kids was going away to live their lives, meet someone and maybe even have kids. It didn’t matter how many times this happened, she has had almost forty kids and it breaked her heart every single time this happened again, that’s the sad part of having kids, at some point they have to go away and spread their wings. At least she hopped that she would visit her sometimes, not like Snufkin that -she was pretty sure- has forgotten her, or Little My that prefered living with the Moomins.

Her daughter smiled and closed the door behind her making her shape disappear into the daylight of a new life for her, some of the little kids were behind Mymble’s dress seeing how her older sister was going away. Probably the little ones were wondering where was she going or what was going to happen to her, Mymble couldn’t lie and say that she wasn’t thinking about that too.

She loved her kids, she loved every single one of them, she loved the fact that they made her feel loved… Maybe that was the reason she had so many. Maybe she was trying to fill an infinite void inside of her. Maybe she missed the feeling of feeling loved, a feeling she lost so many years ago and tried to hide with some casuals one-night-stands that turned into a lot of kids to take care of, not that she was annoyed about it, not at all, she loved using her life to make the life of these little ones better, even if that meant that she was going to rise them in a quite questionable manners, she wanted them to grow into what they really are and not what she has made them be.

But it was at moments like this, when she was heading into the kitchen to make the dinner for the little ones, that she started to question her life decisions, she started to remember a lot of things, a lot of moments, colors, sensations… And a lot of people.

Mymble’s daughter’s father, her first love (not the only one though), an adventurer, always seeking for new sensations, God, she loved to no end, she loved the feeling of his strong arms around her, the little kisses he gave her when he thought she was asleep (those little kisses made her skin burn up with passion), the walks in the forest hand-in-hand and the little secrets they told each other only looking at each other’s eyes, eyes full of starlight and futures. His lips, so soft and warm, the kind of lips she has been looking for in all those crazy nights with strangers. They didn’t broke up because of the kids, they had almost ten kids together and they looked so happy raising them as a happy couple, preparing the food and helping the little ones get dressed. They broke up because of her, perfect body and perfect eyes matching her perfect hair. His affair. Mymble knew why that happened, after giving birth to so many children her body experienced… a few changes that made her look different compared with the body she had years ago, her figure wasn’t as thin as it was.  
She started to have a problem with her body-image, not that she showed it and not that it was present in the guy’s eyes, probably the guys thought ‘’Wow, look at her’’ whenever they saw her, so pretty.

It was at that moment that she remembered Snufkin’s father, that man with cat ears, red hat and feline blue eyes. He was the closest one to her first love, his lips were soft and her embrace so warm, full of that love she missed.

But he was an adventurer too, and he was quite too fond on his adventures to let that go.

They didn’t even last a year in the relationship, but he grew way too quickly into her, whenever she saw him her heart would start racing and her face would start to feel hot, on the contrary of what she would have thought about her body-image, he thought she looked amazing, tall woman still looking stunning after giving birth to all those babies, he felt so lucky in so many ways, he had never felt his heart beat as fast and strong as it did when he saw her, it was the first time he felt that kind of thing.

He went on an adventure and he never came back.

The Mymble assumed he left her, so the round of night-stands started again, giving life to Little My.

‘’Why are you crying, mom?’’ One of the little kids asked.

Crying?

The red haired woman touched her face feeling something wet rolling down her cheek. Realizing what was happening she quickly cleaned her face and smiled.

‘’Mom is not crying, see?’’ She asked showing the best of her fake smiles.

She really missed that type of love, the one that would hug you from behind and give you little kisses whenever this type of things happened. The kids were too young to know if they needed to hug their mother or not.  
She turned off the cooking fire and excused herself, going fast to her cozy room and lying down on her red and soft bed, only to cry her heart out, Mymble couldn’t let the kids see her like this, a mother should be strong, not someone weak that couldn’t even keep the love of her life in her home… Her life.

Why now? Why did she have to start crying at this moment? Her daughter was going to start her life, she had to be happy for her, but she left, just like those two loves, and she started to feel alone again. ‘’You have the kids’’ she tried to tell herself, but they were going to leave sooner or later, and that fact scared her to death.

‘’Mom! We are hungry!’’ One of the little boys shouted.  
‘’I’ll be there in just a minute!’’ She tried to say without sounding too broken.

So she tried again, she got up from the bed and walked into the big stone kitchen they had only to start again the bright and hot burning fire for cooking.  
Not too long after that she gave each little one their plate with their food, she was about to sit down when there was a knocking at the door. She stood up really quickly. ‘’Is she back again?’’ She was hoping her daughter to be at the door with her wet face crying and telling her how a huge mistake she has made because she didn’t know where to go.  
She opened the white door, smiling and about to say ‘’Come in and tell mom what happened’’ but the words didn’t come out.

She was in shock.

The sweet breeze of autumn made her hair move in a quite poetic way, but her hair wasn’t the only one that was dancing with the wind.

It was him, maybe a few grey hairs and tired eyes, but it was him, how could she forget those cats ears, that red hat and feline blue eyes?

‘’I-I…’’  
‘’I’m sorry I’m so late, Mymble’’ the cat man said.

It was at that moment she realized he was holding a bouquet of yellow and blue flowers. He was looking down, maybe he was expecting another man to come out and give Mymble a kiss on her cheek while asking who he was and what was he doing in his house holding some forest flowers.  
But that moment never came.

Mymble couldn’t let the words come out, she forgot how to do that and she felt like she was holding her breath.  
She couldn’t hold it anymore.  
She started crying.

‘’Mymble?’’ Joxter asked taking a step closer to her.

She tried her best to stop those tears, to smile again and say that she has missed him more than she expected. She surely wasn’t expecting butterlies to dance in her stomach after seeing him again, and one thing she was sure of, there were more butterflies than with Mymble’s daughter’s father.

‘’Mymble, hey, look at me’’ The feline man said placing his hand on her shoulder ‘’I’m sorry i’m late, we got lost and we didn’t know how to get back and-’’  
‘’It has been 12 years, Joxter’’ she said trying to control her broken voice.  
‘’I know’’ he sighed, he felt like he was going to cry too ‘’I thought we were lost forever, that we were going to die there…Our memories together were the only things keeping me sane, the thought of coming back home and having you in my arms’’

She started to cry again and she felt Joxter’s arms surrounding her after leaving the flowers on the floor. At this point, all the kids were watching the scene with curious eyes, feeling protected under the power of the painted wooden walls.

‘’I’ve missed you so much’’ She cried.  
‘’I’ve missed you too, my love’’ he kissed her.


End file.
